no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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