Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
