I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize