obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize