They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
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i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
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Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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