is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Randomize