I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Randomize
