White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
