I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
