Soap is not a condiment
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
