I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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