you turned your livingroom into a bong?
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Randomize
