That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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