you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
