What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Randomize
