im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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