Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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