So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
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