Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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