This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
