i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
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