and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
