What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize