Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
