I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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