I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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