I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Randomize
