"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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