PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize