It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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