Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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