he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
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I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
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I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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