i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize