You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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