People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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