i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
