Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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