How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
