I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
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