hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
