"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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