We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize