OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
