Non-Jews are for practice
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
