would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Operation Purity has been aborted
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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