Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I have surprise drugs for everyone
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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