your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
The dick lei will go down in squad history
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