I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
