I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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