It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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